Sunday, March 24, 2013

Another flashback! The Viva Las Vegas Mini-guide.

My friend Liz wrote this tidbit in 2007. I think it is so brilliant, I need to read and share it every year on Facebook. I've done a few alterations to keep it modern, as it was written when VLV was still at the Gold Coast instead of the Orleans, where it moved in 2008 or 2009. 

Here is a little gem that captures the spirit and should put a smile on your face....

Viva Las Vegas Mini Guide

So I suck and have slacked totally on this year's Vegas guide.. I really don't even really have time to be writing this one but in a nutshell let's see what I can do...

Mission Statement:
For all of those who say that Vegas is lame due to the lack of a good line-up or that it's too much of a fashion show, you are doing it wrong. Vegas is not about bands or being the fanciest (well I'll get to that in a second). Vegas is about excessive drinking, whoring and causing trouble in the most sinful city in the US. Period.

Alright. Let me just get this out of the way. I will keep the rules as simple as possible as I do this every year and if you don't know by now, you deserve our mocking.

1. Just because it zips, don't mean it fits: Year after year, we scream this, yet it seems to fall on deaf ears. Just because you wiggled your fat ass into it, doesn't mean it looks good. And once again, if you have massive cellulite issues, PUT THE PLAYSUIT DOWN. I swear to IPU, I'm gonna start egging any fucking girl who doesn't belong in a playsuit who is strutting around the car show. And I'm tired of saying this and it seems retarded that I have to reiterate this but I have nothing against the larger people of my gender, I AM ONE! However, you're not gonna see me in a playsuit or anything else that exposes my flaws to the world.

2. Just because it's vintage, doesn't mean it's cute. Leave the polyester paisley dress at the Goodwill please.

3. Repro: I like repro just because I'm sick of vintage clothes falling apart, but be forewarned that hundreds of other girls bought that stop staring dress, you better be damned sure you look better in it and don't mind wearing the same outfit.

4. Flames, cherries, etc.. Do I have to? really.. come now.. use your head

5. Shoes: I heart shoes. They are awesome. Vegas destroys your feet, both boys and girls. Make sure you have some sorta comfy shoes you can put on after the blood starts gathering around your toes. If however I see you in flip-flops and you are not on your way down to the pool, I reserve the right to step on your ugly feet.

6. Guys: For fuck's sake, look at all the women dressing up around you, do them a favor and put on something besides a wife beater and jeans, you trashy fuck.

7. Mr. & Mrs. I am wearing vintage down to my underwear and you are lame because you are not, BITE ME. Wear whatever the fuck you want. Just do it with a sense of style please. I don't give a rat's ass that you spent 500 dollars on your Hawaiian dress, if I wore something like that I'd either puke on it or it would get ripped by some European guy getting me naked, so enjoy being uncomfortable.

Vegas Ass:
*disclaimer* I do not encourage those who come to Vegas with or without their significant others to Vegas to cheat. People make their own drunken decisions. And remember, what happens in Vegas, gets posted on Facebook.

-Finding that special someone:
So there are a few levels of Vegas ass... they vary depending on timing, day of the week, amount of drunkeness, how attractive you yourself are, luck, etc... so general guidelines (all rules subject to change):

Thursday: Use that as your general scouting night. Unless you are a veteran, chances are you might get stuck with someone for the whole weekend and you might find a higher quality Friday or Saturday.

Friday night: This is when the best quality ass will be found. Make yourself available. As we learned the hard way in 05, don't wolf pack. Traveling around with a group of extremely hot girls will get you noticed but not get you laid. Boys are pussies and are intimidated by large groups of women.

Carshow: Good place to scout and get free drinks. Be wary of the guys taking pics of every car tramp they see. There's something better.

Downstairs bars: The chances of you getting some are increased by hanging out at the bars downstairs. Better chance to talk and people are usually going back and forth. And plus, chances are that is where you will find my group. We like this area as it's close to liquor and in between stuff. We are also not shy and are good at getting people laid.

Room parties: Amazing scoring territory. It's much easier to pick a pony out of a room of 20 people then it is a room of hundreds. Don't know the people at the party? Carry a bottle of liquor with you, they'll invite you in, especially if you are a girl and have boobs. Boobs get you many things and can be exchanged for goods and services.

Sunday Night: Anything goes. Pretty easy to get some on Sunday as it's last ditch effort time. You'd be surprised at what you come up with sometimes though. I've had some amazing Sunday nights.
If you're taken: If you significant other is there, make sure you and your roomie have something worked out to avoid the embarrassing incident of them showing up to your room. Strangers, stick with strangers, our world is very very small and chances are you know everyone in some way but I'd try to target people who live on the opposite coast at least.

Stop talking: This is mainly for the dumb boys (although I'm sure it can be applied to a female or two).. Just shhh.. shhh.. tell me I'm pretty, buy me a drink. Really don't need or care enough to hear your philosphy on life. We can talk about that afterwards if you haven't been thrown out of the room yet.

Foreigners: Viva la Germans! and all others who don't speak English well. You are adorable and usually make for good casual encounters.

Other general rules:
-Security: For the most part on Friday and Saturday, security is gonna let you get away with a LOT. There are too many people for them to enforce much. Sunday be on the lookout. By then they are tired of our shit and enough people have gone home, that they begin to enforce the rules. Still leniant but you gotta be careful and you're having sex in the bathroom, have someone guard the door unless you want to be escorted to your room by five security guards (that didn't happen to me, honest, I wish I could claim that honor. Security chapter I salute you and will do my best to live up to your name this year)

-Booze: When you get there, by the boot. Then buy your liquor in the downstairs gift lobby or in a liquor store around Vegas. Much cheaper. Also, remember they give you free drinks when you're gambling. And worse comes to worse, look for Kelly. He'll be standing by some bar giving out shots to people who proclaim their love for him so remember the the words "I love Kel." (Sadly for us, Kelly got married and we are deprived of his company now)

-Double Down: Try and get out there at least once. It's my favorite bar in Vegas. They have tried to duplicate it here but it's not the same. Make sure you ride the pony and get a shot of Ass Juice.. not at the same time though..
Sunscreen: it's Vegas. You are pasty from living in the land of Winter. Use your judgement and don't forget your cleavage.
-Food: I have heard they closed the downstairs Terrible Mike's. That makes me sad. I think there is still one at the bowling alley (good place for nachos and pizza). Also cheap ass hot dogs by the bettting tracks downstairs. And splurge on the buffet once or twice but bring a big purse and take stuff up to your room for later. Bloody Mary's count as meals and remember: food doesn't get you drunk (usually)
Holly and I at VLV last year

A blast from the past on Endangered Clothing and Etsy!

If anyone remembers my NYE post from 2011, I was wearing a fabulous 1940s dress, navy blue with white cherrys, red details and rhinestone buttons on the bodice with a red 49er jacket over. I purchased this great rayon dress from Mill Street Vintage and loved it, but alas, it was always a bit small in the hips. The dress is now available for sale on Endangered Clothing and you can pick up the matching 49er jacket on Etsy! The dress actually has 38-42" hips, not only 38." I had 45" hips when I wore it.


Thursday, March 21, 2013

Vegas here I come!

Selling on Etsy and the Ooh La La group on Facebook is working well, and it looks like I will be attending Viva Las Vegas!

I just listed some more amazing items on Etsy I want to share with you. You can click the links above the items to go to the Etsy listing.


If you see something you want to purchase and you are going to Vegas for Viva Las Vegas, send me a private message on Etsy and I can do a Vegas delivery.

Wednesday, March 20, 2013

Help me get to Viva!!!

I am in a mad dash to make enough money to go to Viva Las Vegas. I just cut the prices on some of my vintage. Check them out!

Tuesday, March 19, 2013

New items listed on Etsy and a Friend Appreciation!

I have just listed some amazing pieces on my Etsy Store

I also want to give a big thank you to Dorian from the website "Endangered Clothing." Without her encouragement and letting me use her lights and dress form, I don't know if I would have begun this endeavor. Thank you, my friend. You can check out her online store here!

Here are the first few I've listed, and I will be listing more in the next day or two.

I will admit, probably the best part of Dorian's helping me is that I get to hang out with Jaxon, her baby.

If you love Hawaiian Dresses as much as I do, check out This Blog!

I've known Mar for about 10 years now. I knew her online, first, through the "Psychobilly Online" website. She was a funny girl who's posts made me laugh. 

In 2005, I spied her at Viva Las Vegas, and was thrilled to meet her. She was so pretty and sweet, with a biting wit. I just loved her, and she always had an amazing wardrobe.

I now get to see her every year at Viva, and run into her whenever I go to the Rose Bowl Flea Market. I was thrilled when she started a blog to showcase her stunning wardrobe.

You can see her blog here, at Conventional Heretic 


Monday, March 18, 2013

An Amazing Mid-Century Find up for Grabs!

I wanted to share this amazing Mid-Century divided dish. I have decided to add it to my Etsy store, although I love it and have never seen anything like it. 

I hope it goes to a loving home.


Sunday, March 17, 2013

I am now on Etsy!

I finally did it! I have opened an Etsy store!

If you want to take a gander at what I'm selling, you can visit my store, Atomic Frocks

Here are some photos of what you can find in my shop:

1940s Floral Rayon Crepe

1950s Style Reproduction made from Vintage Fabric and Vintage Pattern

1950s Chiffon over Acetate Floral Shelf Bust Dress


Made by Lena